Well where to $#^&ing start….I wrote this post once already, but for some $&%*ing reason when wordpress published it the whole got-#*^*ed post disappeared and only the title showed up….GGGRRRR! I don’t need this, I’m still recovering from the flu, I’m tired, and my stomach is queasy. So for sanity sake I’m not going to write out the long version which just got $^%*ing erased, but a shorter more streamlined version. So buckle up people I’m taking off.
11:45pm on thursday night – Just getting to bed, man I’m gonna be tired tomorrow.
12:00am Friday morning – My husband’s cell phone rings, he’s on call. Great!
12:45am – Husband comes back to bed and wakes me up just as I’m getting to sleep.
12:57am – The friggin “Lickapalooza starts” My friggin dog wont stop licking himself and it’s driving me insane. I kept hearing “Lick, lick, snort, lick, chew, chew, chew, lick, meow, cock-a-doodle-doo”, I said in a calm and restrained voice “HOLLYWOOD IF YOU DON’T STOP THE $#&*ING LICKAPALOOZA I’M GOING TO HAVE YOU CASTRATED!”. Then I heard him slowly slink to our bathroom….Thank Gawd!
6:00am – My alarm goes off….I didn’t say any obscenities, but I thought them as I hit the snooze button.
6:10am – Alarm goes off and I hit the snooze button harder. I continued this process until about 6:27am when I finally drug my weary butt out of bed.
6:35am – I then went downstairs and turned on the coffee maker, and went to the back yard to smoke. While out there I discovered the gift which the neighbors cat had left for me. A dead baby rabbit was laying right outside my back door. EEEWWW!
7:00am – I went upstairs to wake the boys and as I was helping my youngest out of bed I noticed that he was soaked. He said “Mommy I forgot to go to the bathroom before bed”…Why me God?…am I evil?…am I being tested?…you’re punishing me aren’t you?
7:00 – 7:15 – I Cleaned up my son & stripped the bed, thank Gawd my nose was stopped up…oh and for Febreeze also!
7:15am – While making my kids breakfast I wondered (I hope not aloud) whether a nuthouse would be so bad! Then I opened the fridge and saw spaghetti sauce spilled everywhere.
I must end my story here, because you get the general idea of how this Got-#*&^ed Friday has gone for me thus far. Besides if I went on there would be way too much #%*&ing symbolism needed.
May your Friday run much smoother than mine.