I Got Nuttin…

…but these funny newspaper ads. Enjoy! 

  • Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.
  • Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
  • Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals,
    and smacks included.
  • Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.
  • We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
  • Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.
  • SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE…ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.
  • HUMMELS – LARGEST SELECTION EVER “IF IT’S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!”
  • TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: $7 – $9 PER HOUR.
  • ALZHEIMER’S CENTER PREPARES FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER.
  • Illiterate? Write today for free help.
  • Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated. Come here first.
  • Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
  • Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you’ll never go anywhere again.
  • Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else.
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10 responses to “I Got Nuttin…

  1. Scratch number 2. I was married to the cow that doesn’t smoke or drink, but another guy took her off my hands. Someday I intend to do something nice for him in return.

  2. Funny!

    With the language barriers in my part of the country just about every sign and classified is something t laugh at.

  3. Ha ha ha . . . Yeah, I need a housekeeper. One that can find the bottom and get out the shit!!!

    ha ha ha ha

  4. Illiterate? Write today for free help.

    I don’t think they are expecting any responses to that one.
    These tickled my funny bone.

  5. Rats, I thought I was the only one with a cow that both smokes and drinks. Expensive keeping him in Jack.

  6. ALZHEIMER’S CENTER PREPARES FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER.

    You know…if and when I get old and have Alz, I hope this argument still works. lol

  7. dragonlady474

    This reminds me of the stuff on engrish(dot)com

  8. Dazd-you probably won’t remember.

    Funny stuff, Mrs.Jose!

  9. They can send that cow to the keeskennis school we will teach her how to.

  10. pssst…MrsJ…you can come out now, the coast is clear.

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