Okay after Dragon’s incessant talk of the crab incident yesterday I figured I may as well tell the story (although it really isn’t much of a story), So in honor of Dragon todays post is all about crabs!
My Crab story
I was in the 8th grade when the dreaded crab incident took place, It happened in biology class during the final exam. I was deep in thought pondering a tough question when I sensed movement on my lap. “What the hell” I thought and upon looking down I found myself staring into the demonic little eyes of a hideous creature. It just lay there staring up at me….OMG the horror!
I immediately let out a blood curdling scream and threw the sucker straight into the air. Of course that scared the crap out of everyone else in the room including the teacher, and I was scolded for my stunt (ME!). Like I put the friggin crab in my own lap!!! As the class settled down and everyone continued with their testing I looked over at Bobby B. (my science partner) and he was smiling the smile of the guilty! Oh I would SO get revenge!
Douglas the Crab
Douglas the humble Crab and Kate the Lobster Princess were madly, deeply and passionately in Love. For months they enjoyed an idyllic relationship until one day Kate scuttled over to Douglas in tears. “We can’t see each other anymore .” she sobbed. “Why ?” gasped Douglas . “Daddy says that crabs are too common,” she wailed. “He claims you are a mere crab; a poor one at that and crabs are the lowest class of crustacean and that no daughter of his will marry someone who can only walk sideways.” Douglas was shattered, and scuttled sideward’s away into the darkness to drink himself into a filthy state of aquatic oblivion. That night, the great Lobster ball was taking place. Lobsters came from far and wide, dancing and merry making, but the lobster Princess refused to join in, choosing instead to sit by her father’s side, inconsolable. Suddenly the doors burst open, and Douglas the crab strode in. The Lobsters all stopped their dancing, the Princess gasped and the King Lobster rose from his throne. Slowly, painstakingly, Douglas the crab made his way across the floor….and all could see that he was walking, not sideways … But FORWARDS . Yes FORWARDS! One claw after another !!! Step by step he made his approach towards the throne, until he looked the King lobster in the eye. There was a deadly hush . Finally, Douglas spoke ……… “I am soooo wasted.”
Where do you find a crab with no legs?…Exactly where you left it.
1 slightly beaten egg
1/2 cup plain low-fat yogurt
2 tablespoons light mayonnaise or salad dressing
1 tablespoon snipped fresh parsley
2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon prepared mustard
1/4 teaspoon paprika
1/8 teaspoon pepper
1 pound crabmeat, drained, flaked, and cartilage removed
1/4 cup finely crushed saltine crackers
Nonstick spray coating
1 medium tomato, sliced
Lemon wedges (optional)
1. In a medium mixing bowl combine egg, 1/4 cup of the yogurt, the mayonnaise or salad dressing, parsley, Worcestershire sauce, mustard, paprika, and pepper. Stir in crabmeat and crushed crackers.
2. Shape crab mixture into five 3-inch patties.
3. Spray a shallow baking pan with nonstick spray coating. Arrange patties in pan. Broil 4 to 6 inches from the heat for 10 to 15 minutes or until lightly browned. Do not turn patties during broiling.
4. Serve crab cakes on tomato slices with remaining yogurt. Garnish with lemon wedges, if desired. Makes 5 main-dish servings.
Make-Ahead Tip: Prepare crab patties; cover and chill up to 8 hours. Broil as above.